Weekly Thoughts:

1. I leave for Utah in three days!
2. It's spring cleaning time for my iTunes. So tortuous, so tedious, so time consuming, but so needed.
3. As I leave home once again, my only regret is leaving behind Missy. iloveyoukitteh.
4. Can't wait to see good friends and have things to do again.
5. By this time next year, I will be finishing up four straight terms/semesters of school. I will probably be dying.
6. Spring is definitely mating season. Erryone and their roommate is getting engaged and married. Happy for them and glad it's not me.
7. I have a lot of crap to pack.

The Mower to the Glow-Worms:

Ye living lamps, by whose dear light
The nightingale does sit so late,
And studying all the summer night,
Her matchless songs does meditate;

Ye country comets, that portend
No war nor prince’s funeral,
Shining unto no higher end
Than to presage the grass’s fall;

Ye glow-worms, whose officious flame
To wand’ring mowers shows the way,
That in the night have lost their aim,
And after foolish fires do stray;

Your courteous lights in vain you waste,
Since Juliana here is come,
For she my mind hath so displac’d
That I shall never find my home.

- Andrew Marvell

First Aid Kit - Emmylou

He is Risen:

Happy Easter! The most important and yet the least celebrated religious holiday of the year.

My life in five years:

Age: 25
Location: Upper West Side or Greenwich Village, Manhattan, New York City.
Marital Status: Single and dating.
Place of Employment: Church Office of Foreign and International Affairs, CIA, the United Nations, CFR, or some equally important job that involves being cool and working in IR.
Pets: Cat with human name, like George or Martin.
Friends: All smart, successful, and interesting.
Apartment: Small, but nice with roommates.
Car: none!
Fitness level: Excellent, from walking everywhere and jogging in Central Park.
Fashion level: 10
Good habits: Going to lots of shows, art exhibits, museums, concerts, plays, etc.
Bad habits: Buying too many designer shoes that I can't afford.
Current goal: Saving for another trip to Europe.

Panc Update:

For those who would like to know, my pesky little pancreatic tumor is still alive and thriving. The tumor is benign and very small right now, but will inevitably turn malignant. One day, probably in my 30s or 40s, it will either spread to my other organs, most likely the liver, and cause problems; or it will grow to a massive size, cause excruciating pain, and cut off the pancreatic bile duct; or turn cancerous. Bottom line, it needs to come out soon before any of this can happen. So, I need surgery. Wait... what? Isn't that why I came home in the first place? Didn't I already decide not to put it off, but be safe and have the surgery as soon as possible? Didn't I come home to get it out and never have to worry about it ever again? Ha. I guess I could give up more school and plan the surgery for this spring... except that there is no way in Hades my sanity could survive another 3-4 months at home. Luckily, the tumor isn't likely to make any progress for awhile. My doctor is comfortable with waiting and watching it for another year to a year and a half, but no more. Therefore, the agreed plan of is:

1) In six months, this August, have another EUS (in other words, take a looksie at the ol' tumor.) If it has grown or changed significantly, plan the surgery for the fall. (please, no)
2) If it hasn't grown or changed significantly (more likely outcome), in another six months, February/April 2013, have another EUS. If tumor is still there and looking menacing, then plan the surgery for later that year, AFTER I GRADUATE.
3) If anything changes in the meantime, like increased pain or symptoms, I need to declare a state of emergency and go to the hospital.

To conclude,

The bad news is:
1) I still need surgery.
2) I gave up a semester at school for nothing. I basically just wasted 3 months at home when I could have been having the stupid tumor scooped out.
3) Everything could still change.
4) I get to have at least two more EUSes! It's not like they make my panc hurt for two days or anything.
5) I may not be able to ever go on a mission.

The good news is:
1) Uhhh... I get to wait until after I graduate to have surgery?
2) At least I know about the tumor and I won't die from pancreatic cancer at 45.