Facebook PDA:

Nobody wants to see it. Nobody wants to read it. You're embarrassing yourself.

Do you realize that Facebook walls are public places? Please keep private words out of the public domain. It just makes the rest of us want to vomit. Also, I think you must have a problem if you and your "baby" only declare your adoration/love for each other or proclaim the other person's inherent "amazingness" over Facebook. Uh, can you not say it in real life?

On Gaining Weight:

Coming home from college is tough. The transition from your new exciting life with new friends, roommates, classes, random adventures, late nights, and complete independence back to your old pre-college life is confusing and a little depressing. You have to revert back to chores, rules, and family responsibilities. It almost like you live two lives: your life at school and your life at home. You see different people, you go to different places, you do different things. The two worlds are separate spheres of existence; the one doesn't know the other. However, the hardest thing is food. Going away to school makes you appreciate food. It becomes precious. You savor the times when you actually have a real meal. A meal that isn't toast, cereal, or rice-a-roni. Life becomes so busy that food becomes a chore. And when you move back home, it is like finding a buried pirate's treasure. A gold mine of carbohydrates, proteins, and fats. You mean, you can open the fridge and eat anything in it? You don't have to worry about only buying food that you can carry back to your apartment? There is a whole pantry full of food that you didn't have to carefully budget and skimp for? And food magically appears every evening for dinner without any effort? And then, if you're like me, you eat too much. And you gain weight. And you look at your butt in the mirror and you see that it has gotten bigger. And your jeans are little tighter around your hips. But you don't want to stop. Oh no. You don't want to stop because you know that you will just have to go back to starvation mode in a few more months. The transition from home to school and from school to home is hard on the mind... and the body.

Foster the People -- Pumped Up Kicks

This is the band to listen to this summer.

Ten Things I Want to Learn How to Do Before I'm Too Old to Do Them:

1. Surfing
2. Sailing
3. Lead Climbing
4. Windsurfing
5. Playing the guitar
6. Flamenco dancing
7. Scuba diving
8. White water rafting
9. Skiing
10. BASE jumping (Okay, not really, I couldn't think of a last one.)

Why is this show so awesome?

What a cute little cat orgy.

Sonnet 130:

My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red than her lips' red;
If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.
I have seen roses damask'd, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks;
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.
I love to hear her speak, yet well I know
That music hath a far more pleasing sound;
I grant I never saw a goddess go;
My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground:
   And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare
   As any she belied with false compare.

By William Shakespeare

Reasons Why I Love Being a Woman:

1. Getting to wear dresses.
2. Women's perfumes smell so much better than men's cologne.
3. Getting to wear heels.
4. Feminine wiles.
5. Long, pretty hair.
6. Men are willing to pay for you.
7. Makeup. (Pimple? What pimple?)
8. Men opening doors for you.
9. Soft skin.
10. Not having to pee in front of other people.
11. Not smelling as bad.
12. Nicer feet.
13. We can be terrible at sports, but still be widely accepted in American society.
14. Getting away with wearing tight pants.
15. It isn't considered homosexual to be fashionable.


Reasons Why I Hate Being a Woman:
1. Periods.

That hair.